Perhaps I should just write, I have no one to speak to, well, at least no-one that I want to speak with.
That feels hard like a judgement on others, but I just don't want to cause more pain.
I'm only spreading grief - grief for so many years of restraint, of not being fully me and now having my belly cut open and "me" spills out all over the street... all over the town... all through the night.
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